Location: Forest Town, California, United States

Many people ask where Helga and I (Vinnie) met. It was at a Jesus Freak festival in the days of my squandered youth. Some brownies were going around that tasted funny and the next thing I know, I'm married to a hippie. But she was cute, and I wouldn't serve a church that hired a divorced pastor, so we are still together till Judgement Day, when I assume we will go our seperate ways. Let me (Helga) add, that it seems the Universe brought Vinnie and I together, who am I to argue. He does have a judgmental nature though, which I find unforgivable.

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

Vinnie here:

I'm sorry it has been so long since I posted. But you see, I accidentally saw, brace yourselves, two R rated films, and I wanted to wait till they were our of theaters, so no one would say, "Well, Pastor Vinnie saw this film, so it's all right for me to see it." I know how you teenagers are. And you deacons.

I assure you, I had no idea these were R rated. The poster for "Little Miss Sunshine" had the rating covered at my local multiplex by a small sign for free popcorn on Tuesdays. I went in to the show thinking it was a return to the wholesome fun of the Shirley Temple era. Those were the days, the little moppet tap-dancing with a kindly elderly man or servant. (Not that I normally approve of dancing, but I think tap may have been the kind of dancing refered to in Scripture as it does not put men and women in compromising positions of body parts touching nor does it involve the Devil's music, rock and roll.)
But this was no Shirley Temple movie. This movie had a filthy mouthed, drug addict grand father, swearing of all kinds, and a child dancing to rock and roll music. But there was worse. There was a homosexual character. The most insidious thing about this character is the writers occasionally had this chararter say things I agreed with. He bad mouthed the positive thinking movement, which I have been bad mouthing for years. And he was funny, but not in a stereotypical frilly way. I liked this character, and that obviously can't be a good thing.
But even worse, there was a young man in the film who read Neechee and had a T-Shirt that read, "Jesus Was Wrong". If that shouldn't have earned the film an NC-17 rating, I don't know what should.
The other R rated film I saw was "The Departed". You must understand, I thought the film was a part of Tim LeHaye's "Life Behind" series. It had sex, violence, swearing, Catholicism, every known vice I tell you. The less said about it the better.
I will not be away so long this time. The gracious (though sadly Hell bound) Helga will join me soon with a list of films to avoid during the Christmas season.

And remember, a good sermon is all the fun you need, Pastor Vinton


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